Sunday 21 April 2019

Happy Easter!


Why are all my children against hair cuts??????


Saturday 20th April 2019

Slightly happier children today. Sort of. I don’t know Jericho’s anxiety is through the roof and he’s being very difficult. I know he doesn’t really like school, but I’m not sure that school holidays are doing him much good either.

Nicholai had work today, that ended up being extended to a seven hour shift. That’s seven hours of walking back and forth pushing trolleys around – it’s going to be a lucrative day for him, but damn that’s a lot of hard work!

His shift started at noon, so Troy and I drove him and then went and did the grocery shopping. The shops were really busy, so although we didn’t have loads to buy it still took a while to manoeuvre round. We had to buy Easter goodies, and although I knew leaving it to Saturday was taking a chance on what would be left I didn’t really care too much. We ended up with a couple of bags of small eggs, the last four Humpty Dumpty eggs at Woollies so the kids will have those, an egg in a box for Troy, and a Disney Pixar egg-cup-bowl-spoon combo for me. (Which I know is really meant for toddlers, but I actually need more of the little melamine bowls so it kind of made sense at the time – admittedly I’m feeling a little bit foolish about this choice now!).

I watched New Moon with Jericho this afternoon, since we watched Twilight last week. He’s seen bits and pieces of all the Twilight movies over time, but this is the first time he’s ever sat down and actually watched them. I don’t know how impressed he is – really he just likes watching tv, but I am happy to share one of my hobbies with him! (Although it is kind of embarrassing to admit that Twilight is a hobby…it’s a complicated thing.)

Troy also pulled all the plastic containers we own out of their drawers/ crates/ boxes in the garage and arranged them on the table so we could go through them. We have culled out broken things/ things without lids/ useless things/ useful things for donation and then rearranged everything back into the drawers and crates. He also did the drawer with all the trays/ cake tins/ muffins tins etc. I’m very pleased – we’re getting more organised in the house and that’s one more box in the garage that has been examined and can be got rid of.


As Troy and I went back to the car after grocery shopping we saw Nicholai, so here he is at his job. 

Friday 19 April 2019

We’ve had a (mostly) lovely and relaxing Good Friday holiday today, at least until this evening which seems to have spiralled down into several children all being weepy and horrible and hormonal – it’s crazy, we were having such a good day and I have no idea how it all went so wrong!

Ugh. There’s not much to be done. Everyone’s had tea now and if they’re all flopping around sulking I don’t know what I can do about it. Hopefully a good night’s sleep will reset everyone and we’ll be back to normal tomorrow.

It was a good morning/ early afternoon before all this though! Benita came over with her kids and so I got to hang out with her. Winnie gave me a concert and Sullivan showed Soren his Pokemon cards and then played a game of Klopp with Nicholai. Dempsey and Alby played with Lego and went on the trampoline and enjoyed petting the lizards. I made scones for lunch, which is a good meal to share with guests because it’s delicious, generally appreciated by everyone (except peculiar people like Nicholai, who made himself a boring old sandwich rather than eat scones) and easy to make extras.

We watched Jesus Christ Superstar this afternoon, so a good Easter sort of movie. I like the music (I used to – or probably still do – own the Australian cast version on cassette and listen to it all the time) and the movie has such bizarre costumes it’s completely fascinating. I also had a lovely relaxing bath and then once I got out I put the dog in and washed her too, since after a couple of days of being a proper dog with Clyde and Cammie she smelled all doggy.

It was good to have a chilled out sort of day, because yesterday was really long. Troy and I were at the office all day, which to be honest I found pretty exhausting. I think it’s just the tiredness of working all day, with the extra stress of it being at the office and it all being kind of scary and unfamiliar make it all feel a bit tougher.

Steve and Jean were doing a Bunnings barbecue for the RSL and had press-ganged Nicholai and Emma into joining them. I have to admit that I knew about this before we went, but I had assumed that they’d be doing it for a couple of hours at most, over lunch time…not quite. It was a four hours shift starting at 8.30am – Nicholai’s face when he found this out was kind of hilarious. Jericho and Soren are too young to assist at Bunnings barbecues, so while the others all headed off to that, Troy and I took them into the office with us.

They were really good actually. They went down to the park for a while, and then sat up upstairs and played on their DSs for a while. We gave them $5 for morning tea and they walked to IGA and bought themselves each a tube of Mentos and a bottle of grape Fanta to share. They had a dollar left after this, so they even bought Troy and I a Kitkat to share with it, which was very kind. They stayed at the office with us until the others picked them up on their way through at lunchtime.

The kids went driving in the afternoon. Emma had fun and did great – she was very proud to tell me that she didn’t even stall it at all this time. (Although I will also say that Steve’s comment on Emma’s driving was, “You can go surprisingly fast in second gear.” Ha ha ha!) Jericho apparently got very anxious and didn’t enjoy it that much, which was a pity because last time he really loved it. He came inside having a moment (or throwing a fit, I don’t know, I wasn’t there) and Jean talked him through it. After that Nicholai actually went outside and drove – the first time ever I think. Honestly he’s been really reluctant but like most things with Nicholai perhaps he just needed more time to get used to the idea. Anyway, I don’t know that he’s ready to rush out and get his Ls and learn to drive for real, but at least this feels like a start. And while I’m not fussed about how long it takes him to learn to drive, I actually DO want him to know how to drive – even if he chooses to generally use public transport in his life, I think driving is a useful skill to have and I want him to have the choice.

Troy and I went to IGA after work and picked up some bread and cream and lemonade so we’d have food for today (cream and lemonade for scones) since all the shops are closed. After that we picked up fish and chips and took that back to Steve and Jean’s and had tea before we packed up the car and left. This made for a later time getting home (it was close to nine) but was probably better as we missed the worst of the Easter traffic. We were really only delayed in one place when they were out breath testing, and apart from that we had a good run home. It was nice to be in our own beds, and since leaving in the evening meant that the laundry from the previous day was washed and dried and packed up clean, I didn’t even bring home bags of washing!

We don’t have too many plans for this Easter weekend. Nicholai is working tomorrow so he’ll have to go to that, and Troy and I will have to go and buy some Easter eggs – I feel like Easter has kind of snuck up on me this year.

Wednesday 17 April 2019

I have lived through my first day as an in-office superfund administrator. I did not get through it with style and aplomb, but I also didn’t do anything too disgraceful. Okay, I cried one time, but hopefully no one noticed (or will pretend that they didn’t – I’m not fussed which).

Seriously, I didn’t mind it too much. I worked in Steve’s office, which is down the bottom at the back, so I was mostly by myself and just did my thing. I had Skype on the computer so I could ask Troy questions when I had them, and obviously I could go up to his office at anytime. Everyone at the office is lovely (seriously, my issues with going there were not about the people at all) so that part was fine. And I wore my teaching shoes, so even though I don’t really own dressy pants it still felt kind of dressed up.

We drove down to Yarra Glen yesterday, getting up at some ridiculously early hour so Troy could drop us off at his mum and dad’s place and then go off to the office himself. It was a pretty relaxing day once we were here – the kids and I just hung out. Jean always has a jigsaw puzzle in progress on the table and the kids and I took it over and finished it off. It was a whole bunch of birds, and it was harder than it looked!

Steve and Jean took the kids over today, while Troy and I were at the office. They all went to visit Great Nana, and then they went to lunch at the Lynbrook hotel – all you can eat buffet and the kids were in heaven. It cracked me up when I came home and asked Soren how many desserts he served himself from the dessert bar and he said, “Oh, hardly any…just some ice cream with marshmallows and some peppermint slice and then some Rocky Road…so not much really.” Keep in mind this was on top of multiple serves of lunch too, it’s really no wonder he split his shorts when he was jumping on the trampoline this morning with the way he’s been eating!

Monday 15 April 2019

I had a really bad day today, just in a personal way – basically all this stress and anxiety and me being hopeless all just kind of came crashing down on me and it was horrible. I hate the way I am.

I have to go to the office this week, and I’m dreading it. This is ridiculous – they want me to go there so that I feel part of things and like a proper part of the team, so it’s really a GOOD thing, and yet I’m just a basic crying mess about having to go out and do people and wear something office-appropriate. It’s one thing to fake my way through every single work day not knowing what I’m doing when it’s only Troy sitting here with me and I’m wearing Uggs and it doesn’t matter if I cry…it’s a different story at the office with proper professional people who know what they’re doing.

Plus, going away is stressful by itself. I have to make sure all the washing is done so that we have what we need to take, makes sure the kids are all packed and the pets all have food and the house is sorted, etc etc. Which isn’t super fun at the best of times, but also has the added element of stress knowing that when we get home I then have to unpack everything and wash forty loads of laundry. And somehow manage to get the chores done that I would usually do when I’m not at work, but I’ll be at work. Like, this is obviously completely doable and I am just pathetic, so it’s not like I deserve any sympathy here – I’m just being a great big whiny baby once again.

Anyway, this stress also lurched into me having basically a breakdown about our planned holiday later in the year. We said we’d go to Central Australia when I first got the job and thought we’d have enough extra money to be able to save up for it easily, but this has not exactly been the case. My job immediately lost us part of our family tax benefit, so right away it’s not as much ‘extra’ income as it seemed originally. Then the fact is that I got a job because the kids are only getting more expensive and we needed more money just for the day to day costs, so there’s not as much to save at the end of the week after we’ve paid for what needs to be paid for. When I come right down to it, I don’t know if we can afford this holiday at this point in time, so we’re going to have to sit down and figure out exactly how much our accommodation costs are going to be, then we can ballpark fuel on top of that, and see if it we can realistically do it. I’d rather know now if we have to call it off so I can stop worrying about it (and might also get deposits back), and we can maybe try and figure out something more affordable. I will be really disappointed if it’s not possible, but I don’t think I can live with this angst and uncertainty and fear of financial ruin for much longer.

I’m really tired of being me right now. I mean, it’s not like there’s any other choice, but fuck this.

Saturday 13 April 2019

The children have welcomed the internet back with open arms. To be fair, so have I. I was using my phone as a hotspot so I wasn’t cut off completely, but it was limited and it meant I couldn’t listen to Spotify when I go to bed and that kind of sucked. However our new NBN internet really doesn’t seem any better than what we previously had, which is something of a letdown.

Troy cleaned the pantry out today. He was inspired by me scrubbing the microwave (which lives in the pantry) and cleaning a couple of the shelves the other day, so today he took everything out and wiped down the shelves and reorganised it all. Not too much out of date food to throw away too, which was a bonus, and now it’s all tidy and clean.

After seeing Lee on Thursday we had an expected dinner together last night as well! Nicholai was going to the football in Melbourne so we dropped him at the trains station and then Troy and I thought we might as well eat tea out. We went to La Porchetta and who should walk in two minutes after we ordered by Lee and her kids! So we dragged over a table and all sat together, which was really quite fun. It just felt so random, we never go out for tea and this one night we do and there she was. Anyway, it was good to have more time to talk and obviously eating restaurant food is better than cooking and eating at home so it was a win all round.

Nicholai came back on the train today, so I went and picked him up this afternoon. Bulldogs didn’t win, but he had tipped against them so although he was disappointed his team lost at least he got a point for the footy tipping competition.

Thursday 11 April 2019

We still have no internet and Troy had to go down to the office this afternoon, so I had an unexpected and delightfully welcome afternoon off work.

The new modem was delivered in the afternoon and Troy is currently standing on a stepladder and fixing it to the wall, so we MAY soon have internet back again. I am not holding my breath though – these things never seem to work as simply as they’re supposed to.

While the kids are no doubt considering these the worst holidays ever without any internet enabled devices to amuse them, I actually have to say that I’m not all that sorry for them. I think it’s been good for them to have to look for other entertainment! Emma and Jericho have hung out together, Jericho and Soren have played with Lego, Emma made Benita’s apple slice this afternoon, they’ve all jumped on the trampoline, Nicholai’s gone for several long walks and listened to all his cds…it’s been pretty cruisey really.

Lee came over yesterday for a little while. She’s having a holiday in Ballarat, so it was good to have a quick catch up.

The new modem and internet works! And yet, despite us now being on the NBN, it’s slower than what we had on the non-NBN! Internet is so SHIT in this country! It drives me berserk that I am forced to pay for such substandard service!