Wednesday 9 August 2017

Teenagers who think they are the ultimate arbiter of what is cool and worthy of praise and what is not are going to be the death of me.

All my children seem to be doing a bit of a number on my self esteem at the moment. I mean, when we got home after walking from school Jericho told me, “Your hair is all frizzed up and you look like a crazy person!” Um…thanks? He also said my singing was his ‘bad thing’ at tea yesterday, so you can guess who is not currently my favourite!

Although Nicholai just appears to think I’m deeply remedial and in need of his wisdom and guidance- he managed to be both pompous AND condescending yesterday as he informed me that I have to update my voting enrolment details so that I can vote in this (possibly?) upcoming plebiscite on gay marriage. Sometimes I just want to smack him upside the head and remind him that all these issues existed and I was aware of them even before he was born, so stop acting like the world should begin and end with his opinions!

Yeah, yeah, don’t take it personally…I need to get this tattooed across the back of my hand, so that I can see it five hundred times a day and remind myself.

Alyssa is back in Indonesia and I’ve been reading all her diaries and looking at all her photos and feeling all kinds of sad that I’m not there. And then I’m also thinking about how hard and scary I find travelling and wishing I was different. Wishing I was different in a lot of ways at the moment, and just feeling all tangled up and messy.

At least I was mildly helpful to someone today, by going to the dentist with Benita and holding Alby for her while she got her teeth done. Although really it was like a treat for me, because he’s so teeny and sweet and new that holding him is hardly a chore. He was awake the whole time, so he just lay in my arms or on my lap and looked around and made crazy faces- I love the way newborns don’t even know how to move their facial muscles and so they’re always just making random weird expressions.

I came home and cleaned up and vacuumed and washed and dried laundry. I am SO SICK of laundry right now- I basically do two loads a day, or more if there are sheets and towels. I was looking at the Harvey Norman catalogue yesterday because we have to get a new clothes dryer, but I kept being distracted by overwhelming desires to get a new 10kg washing machine to go with it. Maybe if Troy just keeps driving his shitty car we could afford one?


My cute little buddy this morning.