Friday 30th June 2017

Today was the last day of term 2, and the last day for the kids at their current schools. I’ve never been that impressed with the high school, but damn it felt like a wrench leaving Dixons Creek today. The school has been so good for my kids, and for me, and there has always been something kind of special about the kids going to the same school that Troy went to when he was a kid. It felt sad to say goodbye today.

I’m not having a good day though, to be honest. I am just so freaking tired, and although we’re so close to everything being done it all just feels so hard and impossible right now.

The buyers of our house have asked for us to extend the settlement period for a week. Troy said we will give them that, but they have to pay our costs associated with the bridging finance for this portion of time. We already have bridging finance since we settled on our Ballarat house two weeks ago, so at least it’s all organised and we didn’t actually have to do anything in regards to this extension today. But I’m still not exactly thrilled. In the end it just delays us getting our money for a week, so I have to wait another week to go and buy anything- this is inconvenient but not exactly life destroying.

There’s also the fact that we will not be coming out of this buying and selling process with anywhere near the money I thought we would. As in, basically enough to buy Troy a new (second-hand car), buy the kids’ school uniforms, and buy a new clothes dryer (but not the good one I wanted). Everything else is just going to have to go on a list and we’ll get to it eventually. So I’m down about not having that money, and feeling like an idiot for not realising earlier that none of my plans were actually going to be possible.

Really, I think it’s just everything together feeling a bit much at the moment. I’m stressed about moving, and it all seems to be piling up on my shoulders and there’s nothing I can do about any of it.

I feel like I have no control in this situation at all- I didn’t get to move today like I wanted to (we’re leaving tomorrow morning), then Troy and Soren are going to the football on Sunday so Troy won’t be at home to help sort anything out, then on Monday Troy is coming back here to work and won’t be home until Wednesday night. I am so useless, and things just keep getting piling up and I don’t know quite what to do about it.

I mean, I knew he’d be down here to work and that it’s just this time of year that he has to do all this extra stuff, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck that I’ll be on my own with the kids and the mess and the half unpacked house to deal with.

I don’t know. All the bedrooms are unpacked, and most of the kitchen. I can unpack all the books and junk that will go in the family room- I can’t pick up boxes full of books, but I can use my Indo teaching trolley or get Troy to move them around before he goes. Not getting our settlement money is problematic in terms of unpacking because there are a couple of bits of furniture I need to buy before I have a place to put some stuff, but there’s not much I can do about that.

There will be a bunch of stuff that Troy will have to be the one to deal with, but I suppose I can dump it all in a box or in a pile for him to deal with at his leisure. Although that’s the problem- he doesn’t HAVE any leisure! At the moment he is somehow expecting to be able to start working from home when he has no office set up in the house at all. His computer is brand new and unopened, we’re not going to have internet until Thursday night, he has no office furniture at all, and the room is still filled up with boxes! Just the thought of it is stressing me out! Really, I have to just let him worry about that, and deal with the things that I can do something about. Troy’s study and the garage are his problem.

And my computer is still not working properly and that is just a step too far! I will have to find the Apple service centre in Ballarat and give them a call to see when I can take it in. It’s just the trackpad- surely they can fix that.

Really, I think I need to just give up on this tonight. Go to bed and sleep, and hope I feel better tomorrow. Even with all this stress it’s still exciting to be going to our new house, and I’m really looking forward to it starting to feel like home.


I wish I was the dog- she seems relaxed.