It poured rain here for quite a while today. The skylight leaked an enormous puddle into the laundry and I could hardly hear my music over the sound of rain hitting the roof. It still wasn’t all that cold though – I am truly surprised that we are in the second week of May and we’re all still wearing t-shirts.
I kind of love Mondays, when the house feels so quiet after the noise and busyness of the weekend. I don’t usually do very much, and today was no exception to that, but I still like it. Having all that time to myself during the day makes it easy to do tea and bedtime on my own, since Troy is at his hockey game.
I watched the Tudors today and did a lot of writing. It was really good today – not necessarily what I produced, but just the fact that I did it and it was coming pretty easily. I’ve been working on this story for months and it has been a very hard slog, but today felt like I found my groove again and it made me happy.
I don’t know, sometimes I’m kind of embarrassed that I still write the way I do. It just seems so self-indulgent, you know? It’s hard to talk about sometimes because I can’t help feeling that everyone else is thinking that by my age I should have either ‘made it’ as a writer or given it away in favour of more sensible pursuits. And at the moment I have no intention of doing either.
I’m not writing with the intent to publish, ever – I’m writing fanfic right now and I’m perfectly content to simply share that online with people who like it enough to read it. I get enough lovely, enthusiastic reviews and comments to make me feel validated, and I’ve had some great conversations and made some good friends with fellow fanfic writers, and quite honestly that’s enough for me right now.
As for not doing it…I can’t imagine a life without writing in it.